Is there a 'THE END'?

THE END?

When i was asked to write my views about ‘ The End’, I wondered what could be written about the topic. 

May be a story that ends differently? Or a story that never ends? :P Some more such mulling over, and I realized its not about some story with a twisted ending, but really my personal beliefs about 'The End'. So I decided to look around and within, and write a few lines about it. Before I take you through my reflections, I wonder if there is something called as ‘The End’. What do you think?

You’ve seen the recent biggest news – Sachin Tendulkar’s retirement, the much talked about episode of the year. Do you call that an end? In terms of scores, may be yes. But in terms of his journey with cricket, not at all; On the contrary, post-retirement career options haven’t been this bright and prosperous, for any other sports figure in India. Consider another one – Nelson Mandela! Is this the end? No way! He is an idea that inspires generations world wide, and he will continue to 'live on' even more gloriously after his death. 

They are legends, but what about the rest? You may ask. So, lets take an example of mundane every day affairs. The work that AzimPremji Foundation in the field of education or any well intended Not-for-Profits' work towards the betterment of society. Is there a real ‘end’ to this? Not really. There may be clear milestones that seem like an end, an important event, or a noteworthy change; but not really an end. Take a look at our age old eastern philosophy, leaping a few steps deeper to say that even death is not considered as an end; rather yet another cyclical beginning.

There is no real ending, it’s just the place where you pause the story. And we can choose how to embrace that pause in our life; accept gracefully or deny its very existence. Unlike the movies, this pause isn’t as dramatic, and may not even be a major event in life; it could be as routine as our daily, month, quarter and year ends at workplace, or as eventful as your successful weight loss! It could be anything from small to significant. Just take a moment to notice, and to experience. 

An End, A Finish Line, Closing Chapters, Shutting Doors, it doesn’t matter what we call it; what matters is to appreciate the pause, reflect and gather strength to move forward with hope. In a way, the end awaits a beginning; and some things are never-ending! So I concluded that there is no such thing as THE END in real life.

And I now truly understand Ruskin Bond; that the adventure is not in the arriving, it’s the on-the-way experience. It’s not the expected; it’s the surprise. Therefore, the end is as important as a beginning, as important as the journey. In fact, like the writer and philosopher Jiddu Krishnamurti, I believe that the Journey is more important than the destination. Some even say that the journey in itself, a destination. And they also say, everything turns out well in the end :-)  

'Although the road is never ending, take a step and keep walking; Pause and look up the sky, on this path let the heart be your guide'

Wishing everyone a meaningful end of this year, and a great beginning of 2014!!

This was first published in Azim Premji Foundation in December 2013.

Pondy | 1

Pondicherry – Give time a break!

Part 1

Pondicherry is a beautiful city and I’ve always fascinated the place.  I lived in Chennai for a brief time and was eager to visit the city but never managed to go, regretting the lost chance when I moved out. So when the opportunity to visit came by now, I wouldn’t lose the opportunity again.

When I visited first in December 2012, the city busted many of my myths about the place. It’s a small town, with simple, cheerful and happy people around. A comfortable overnight journey in KSRTC Volvo bus and I reached Pondy (as it’s famously called) in the early hours of the day. Green Palace hotel is at a stone’s throw away from the bus stand and a nice place to stay in.

My colleague Gopi met me at the hotel and we were off to the office in the morning. The office is a pleasant French villa and I was taken by the beautiful architecture and open spaces of the house. The ambience is comfortingly cozy, yet provides for individual spaces to work. The library is placed right next to the entrance, and has an inviting feel to it.

In the two days of visit, I had visited two schools nearby along with Gopi. I first went to a school nearby during noon, and I sat with children in English class, and interacted with teachers. I later visited another school, attended a very engaging story telling class by Gopi, participated in a drawing class with the children and returned with a big smile on my face. While many things at the school were memorable, the sheer positive energy of children at school, beautiful art work done by them, and carefree noisy & playful atmosphere of the schools stayed with me for long.

The evenings were memorable too, with breezy walks at the beautiful beach, quite moments at the Manakkula Vinayakar Temple, delicious dinner at Anand Bhavan, and bumpy rides through the buzzing Nehru Street. I also got happily lost in Chetty Street, looking for a pastry shop which I never found. The local buses are much fun to travel in too – with enjoyable peppy music, pleasant passengers and helpful bus drivers and conductors. Walking is quite a pleasure, particularly in and around the French town. Interestingly, the locals usually gave direction using the statues as landmarks. You’d hear them say, ‘your place is 2 km south of Indira Gandhi statue’, ‘the bus stop is after Rajiv Gandhi statue’; that’s when I noticed that Pondicherry is full of statues of leaders.  No wonder the city seemed safe amidst so many statues of national leaders around!

Time spent at the paradise beach is another sweet event. There is a ferry to cross over to an island of scenic water body, white sandy shores and a big landscape, a beautiful feast for the eye. The wind is slow and soothing with only the sound of the waves as a lullaby. Small benches and shacks nearby are conveniently placed to relax, and the ocean just pulls all your attention, letting you unconsciously disconnect from the external and internal noise, and become one with the nature. You’d see people around in their own bubble of peace, and with a company of good book/music, what more to ask for? The beach is a pure bliss, and truly a paradise!

Land of Gods | 2

Lets begin!!

Prepare, Prepare, and Still Preparing!

While I had resolved my mind about going for the trip, which was a big step in itself, I had to now prepare for the trip. The preparation was mainly three fold. 1) Physical preparation through medical tests 2) Keeping the body and mind ready for such a hard trip, through regular exercise and meditation 3) Packing the right things for the trip, which includes an ever ending of things, some of the item names I had heard for the first time.

I had done the first part of preparation; attempted the second part of preparation, which I miserably failed and now beginning the 3^rd step - the daunting task of packing for the journey. I had religiously printed all the instructions and nicely filed it in a beautiful folder, I hadn’t made time to go through them carefully until just before the trip. Hectic work schedules, not-so-kind environment had kept me on my toes and I had lost sight of the effort needed for the trip. I woke up a week before the yatra, and discovered that I had a long list of things to do.

Jackets, Rain Gears, Thermals, Bags, Hats, Sun Shades, Gloves, Socks, Shoes, Medicines, Snacks, Travel Kits and the list went on endlessly. I tirelessly shuttled between the two floors of my house transporting truck load of clothes, weigh, remove, put it back, bring a new set and looked like a headless chicken. I’d suddenly realize that I didn’t have enough stuff, and within minutes I’d hop out of the house in a rather dis-helved hair and cringed clothes to stride the long corridors of Bangalore streets and shops. The clock was ticking and I was not even close to a good start. I walked, talked, slept and dreamt about packing for the trip, the next few days! I guess I looked horrified and my family stepped in to support (phew! What a relief!), and some friends offered to help. Finally, the packing began and soon after, things started to fall in place (don’t even get me started about the multiple trips I made to Decathlon stores, and at wee hours just before my flight). Thanks dad, for touring me around in Bangalore without a word of complaint, and without expecting a word of compliment. I couldn’t have done any of this without your help.

I almost missed a gift (a beautiful diary) from my friend, but managed to find a small but old note book and some pens bought last minute for writing a travelogue during the journey. I also made that quintessential last minute shopping of back pack, just before I crashed for some shut eye for a couple of hours nap, before I headed for the flight. Finally, it’s all done. I don’t even know if I packed it right, but here I am, at Air India Flight going to Delhi; sitting beside a young man, blissfully sleeping, and beginning the diary of a girl embarking on a mountainous trip to the great Kailash and Mansarovar.

I wish myself a safe and once-a-lifetime journey to the Land of Gods! 

Happy Journey! J 

Land of Gods | 1

Kailash Mansarovar – An Epic Journey!

Warming up!

This is my first trip abroad on a holiday. I had not planned, aspired for or even dreamt about it. The idea of going to Kailash Mansarovar happened by fluke, in a matter of moments, just like that! A strong inertia, some divine push, and I immediately signed up for the trip over the internet, at a midnight sometime in March 2013 – after a long day’s work in an NLP training.

Despite registering, I could not believe that I had signed up for the trip. It was impulsive, all too quick, too curious and way too sudden. The thought of going there firmed up after meeting my friend Nandini, over some fine sushi in a Japanese restaurant in Bangalore. The night was beautiful, the wind caressing and the company and conversation memorable. And there I had begun the journey (in my mind) to Kailash.

I remember sharing the news of my travel to Kailash to Richard McHugh, my fascinated genius of NLP, almost jumping with joy. His eyes sparkled, smiles widened and he wished me well. Soon after my training, I got back to daily routine and work; and I had forgotten (well, almost!) about the trip – until the time I had to do endless set of medical tests and be certified by a licensed physician that am medically fit for the journey.

Countless number of visits to the hospital (a wee bit of exaggeration I must confess, but it sure did feel like that!) exhausted me both mentally and physically – not to talk about the money I spent going through myriad tests. I had not expected such high level of scrutiny by my travel guide (Isha) who insisted that I do every single test specified by them and send the latest reports. I somehow managed to complete this scrutiny and felt a hue of relief, and there began the travel preparations for the trip. It was also not easy to come to terms with the huge amount of money I had to pay for the travel guide, this being the most expensive trip I had ever undertaken for myself. Although this was agreed earlier, I realized I wasn’t prepared for it in reality, and held a belief that this was beyond my limits of luxury.

The long registration process (including the money to be paid), made me re think about the decision to pursue this trip a few times. I went back and forth many times, calibrated the purpose of it all, and in the end I was completely confused. What was I going to Kailash for? While I had self-promoted myself to experience ‘mid-life’ crisis sooner than my biological age and stage of life, I am surely not as old and wise yet to renounce the world to pursue the spiritual journey. So why was I really going there? I had no idea, nor did that matter much perhaps. It isn’t usual that I decide things like this in a blink, turn my impulsive decisions to reality; I am neither someone who is so passionate about travelling, visiting an exotic place every year, or a trekker by interest. So, in all – my reason to pursue Kailash was mysterious and unknown, and yet I knew in my heart that I wanted to go, and I didn’t have the power to withheld or withdraw from it.

So I decided to pursue the trip even though it had no apparent purpose. Perhaps, the purpose of the trip was to find its purpose. So the aimless desire to travel strengthened and I began preparing for the trip now. I decided that I wouldn’t go back and forth on this again and I will go experience the abundant nature and the divine power it holds. My family, a rock support through my thick and thin, particularly my mom, never failed to encourage to me go and let myself go with my gut and intuition; not be so worried about fitting it into an epistemological equation. She was right, and I thought, this is it! I will not let this opportunity slip away, and I will make it.

And that’s where my real journey begins! J

A Memoir - My School

I, me and my school!

The memory of my childhood is mostly about the school life for me. While i shifted 2-3 schools due to family movements, my strong memories are of the school in Bangalore, where i spent most of my schooling.

When I reflect, it’s clear that my core personality was shaped while I was at school, and I seem to have picked up a few practices during school days, that have become a way of life till date.

A case in point is the practice of walking and use of public transport. I walked to school, school to home, home to special interest classes, and walked back home - i always walked where ever i went - and i continue to consider walking intuitively, than hiring an auto to commute.

I later used public transport to go to college, and again - that stuck with me later in life too - whichever place i go to - i look at the buses - and how the routes connect to my destination, and navigate through the city. This was a huge advantage when i visited abroad. While my colleagues would spend a fortune booking cabs to see around the city, I’d choose to walk and travel by public transport, one of the best ways to intimately experience the city.

My interest in subjects, vastly depended upon how much i liked the teacher teaching that subject - i was fortunate to have teachers who showered all the love and affection possible, and pushed me on all kinds of extra-curricular activities - from extempore speech, writing essays, arts and sports.

My love for reading, writing and learning languages – unsurprisingly stemmed from my amazingly inspiring teachers at school. They instilled a sense of freshness to learning language. English was a big pull, and i remember my science teacher usually conversing in English with us, just so we become fluent. She used to often ask to meet my parents, and showed them how well i did at school - and motivated them to support me in my interests both in and out of school.

I was the official 'news-maker' in the school - someone who'd read the newspaper for the assembly every day - a habit that caught on even after school laid the seed of interest with current affairs. I continue to love things that i loved as a child. My ease with writing, is a gift from my school teacher, who'd train us on structuring our thoughts first, making it a pleasant reading experience for the reader, and use of colors even in an examination paper. I loved going to school, hugely motivated to travel and represent my school in all the competition nurturing competitiveness through life, even beyond schools.

While life seemed great, there are a few regrets too! I was too busy as a child, never had a scheduled 'play time', Wish I had played a lot more carefree and experienced the joy of doing nothing.

School had grinded social pressures of achieving marks, getting admissions in a good college and building individual excellence - wish i had a head start in learning how to work in group, collaborate and appreciate the collective goodness from early on. Some projects or works of art acknowledging a group's effort than creating individual heros – thereby indirectly learning to collaborate and building trusting, secure relationships.

All said and done, my school experience sculpted my individuality and as a person. These years laid the foundation for me to become self aware, confident, comfortable with solitude yet enjoy the social interactions. My childhood is a treasure of pleasant memories of my school, teachers and friends I made during that time. The world seemed perfect, with full of promises and hope for future. What a good life! J

Article published first in Bayalu, a monthly magazine by Azim Premji Foundation | November 2013

Pondy | 3

Pondicherry – Give time a break!

Part 3

The last day of the trip was a visit to Auroville, an experience of tranquility yet adventurous. The ashram is about 40 kms away from the city, inside a long and dwindling roads leading inside the villages. With the help of a couple of friends, I was allowed inside the matrimandir, a huge gold globe like structure.

The matrimandir, a round shaped structure signifying the centre of a lotus bud - is beautiful place with breadth taking simplicity and absolute tranquil inside the mandir. The round shaped glass like crystal at the centre of the mandir carries the sun light like a shining diamond ray piercing through the hall in straight line. The sun ray brightens up the entire hall, allowing for peaceful concentration and absolute silence.  With the walls, floor carpets, doors all in white color, the hall seems straight from the heaven. 

The mandir is situated many meters higher than the ground level, with 12 petal- like structure surrounding below the bud, is a one of a kind architecture. Each petal uniquely designed with a meditation hall inside the petal like structure, marked for a value that unites humanity (such as compassion, gratitude).  The petal is surrounded a beautiful garden of a specific type of flower, signifying the quality of that petal. Beneath the mandir is the culmination of all the petals and the bud like structure – a walk down from the mandir leads us to this place where the same sun rays passes the  small crystal inside the circle, very similar to the one above.  The entire zone is known as ‘Peace’, and maintained with complete silence.

The age old banyan tree and an open amphi-theatre that has soil of 142 different countries around the world is situated right next to the Mandir. After the visit to the area of peace, we headed to the administrative block of the ashram, got a map of the place and headed to Cita Dyn, a place of art and crafts. I then headed to the visitors centre; saw a nice video of the ashram, paintings and pictures in the exhibition.

It was time for lunch, and I rented a cycle and headed to the solar kitchen – asia’s biggest solar kitchen. It’s the canteen meant only for the ashram residents and cash transactions are not accepted here. I really wanted to taste the food of the ashram, and the solar energy based preparation. Upon request, one of the ashram residents agreed to take me along, and we had a nice long conversation over lunch. The lunch is a simple south Indian or a simple western food, with big wooden seating arrangements and spacious dining hall. Ramachandra, who manages the small scale industry village was kind enough to share his life and stay in the Ashram, and his pretty daughters, invited me to their fire dance show. They study at the ashram school. The ashram has residents from citizens of 45 different countries and is melting pot of different cultures of the world.

After a long lunch, I headed to Savithri Bhavan which has books, exhibits and interesting pictures of Aurobindo through his life stages. The hall is big and very beautiful, with stunning architecture and statue of Aurobindo. I later visited Bharat Bhavan - a huge library and Indian artifacts, a nice place to visit. I also went to a Tibetan Villa which was inaugurated by Dalai Lama and had a temple stone from Tibet. It has exhibition of Tibet evolution, their monastery and long history of Chinese, Mongolian and Indian influence. A Tibetan child, with red cheeks and twinkling eyes watched me as I moved around the villa, buzzing in activity - the sound of a theology class in progress at the room above, and the melodious beats of a bharatnatyam class.

The visit to Auroville ended with warm experience of seeing different cultures co existing, intimately connected to beautiful nature around. It’s an amazing story of the human effort in converting a barren land into a beautiful forest, where people from around the corners of the world, live as one united community.

 The experience of cycling blissfully around the ashram was another high moment of the day. I had touched a cycle after many many years and it left me with nostalgic memories of my school days. Overall, it was a nice experience of visiting auroville, and a day spent well.

Pondy | 2

Pondicherry – Give time a break!

Part 2

I returned from Pondicherry with pleasant memories and thought I’d come back soon but it took nearly a year for me to return to the city in Nov 2013. The memories of the city had faded, including the innumerable statues and how people navigated the place! :P In that sense, this  was another new visit to the city and the people.

Thara and I had a pleasant bus journey and reached Green Palace Hotel at around 5.30am, waking up the hotel staff to check us in; ) Our room was at 4^th floor (4106), a simple yet clean room. We reached office in the morning, and had a busy day ahead. We were joined by Sumithra in the evening for a quick outing to the beach. The ocean, the wind, the beach shops, the temple, Anand Bhavan and all the places around refreshed my memory and I relived the happy experience once again J This time, we had a nice dinner at a French place, travelled by bus and headed home happy. The evening was fantastic with great company and beautiful beach.

The next day, I along with a bunch of colleagues visited the international short film festival at Pondicherry University, for the movie ‘Nero’s guests’ – a fine movie showcasing the work of P Sainath, watched in rapt attention by the audience. The movie pierced my heart, and I couldn’t take the reality of Vidarbha tragedy. We were soon joined by Sainath himself amidst a thundering applause showing deep respect and appreciation for his grass root work.  The next hour was all about Sainath, and his firey speech, with each statistics telling a grim story. I was emotionally drained and lost in melancholy. 

We came back to office for lunch, and my hang over was hard to get over. I looked for some magic to pull me out from the morning depression, and god answered it with a sweet surprise! I got a phone call from a friend and pepped me up completely; I was relieved to find myself smiling and continued the day ahead. While the experience of the morning was disturbing, I was glad to have gone there and witnessed the film festival – a day that changed my perspective and strengthened my conviction for the cause and continue my journey of service.

The last day of the trip was a visit to Auroville, an experience of tranquility yet adventurous. After a nice day at Auroville, I headed back to the city for an evening with Sumithra, had fun time chatting up, dinner near the beach and spent quite moments watching the ever rolling, splashing white waves and bid good bye to the beautiful city of Pondicherry.

A heritage city with a potpourri of different cultures and beautiful people; surrounded by a stunning ocean, seducing every visitor to come back again, and again!